Dee-Rob

I have been unbelievablely not writing. Part lazy, sheer, ugly bone lazy. Part ennui or something like it. Any thought to write has dribbled into lack of action then nothing.

But, I was reading Tony’s Blog Emporium. He’s writing more or trying and so should I. He’s like a champion role model, only of the comedic variety.

Meanwhile, WordPress.org released software for the old Droid telephone I be using. So there’s that.

On the creative brightside, I haven’t totally given up or killed my soul. After taking 36 million pictures or so on our last trip I felt crafty inspired. Awhile back on an impulse buying whim, M. had thrown a giant frame with a mat full of windows suitable for throwing up a collage of memories into our shopping cart. It has haunted me.

Haunting became the right word, when I finally felt resolve to do something with it. Back in the way, way east (or the east that white cartographers decided was east) there’s a nifty little tradition based in Taoism. Because ancestral spirits like to keep an eye on things, and venerating the dead is an important pasttime, you’re likely to find some great old family pictures on a Chinese family’s wall. I don’t know from burnt offerings or lighting joss sticks next to a homemade altar heavy with tangerines and whatnot, but I like cool photos. M.’s mom has great ones. I’ve taken a few pictures of her pictures.

Stepping back, one thing M. and I have in common is families that have clocked some years each generation. I think his grandfather on his mom’s side would have been about 10 years younger than my mom’s dad. This grandfather is the adventurer who headed off of China’s Hainan Islands and found his fortune in Malaysia.

We each grew up with images from early last century, sepia and gray-toned history. Like my grandfather’s wide-brimmed hat and gaiters, a young doughboy headed out to fight the Kaiser’s army.

That and our tremendous egos and equally tremendous cache of photos of each other and ourselves and ourselves together provide the nugget and the expansion if the craft project. A collage of us and of family.

When all is settled, I’ll probably figure out a web version or maybe just post something here with the rejects. A little bit of honoring the ancestors and a little bit of self worship.

So far, I have seen the paltry, slight vision of one monkey, off in the distance ambling near the highway ditch, from a speeding, “almost as good as first class” coach.

However, last night was the New Year’s Eve reunion dinner. The first event of a series of eating events, as the family home-for-the-holidays gathering commences. The crowd is indeed a crowd, although it is slightly reduced from what was anticipated because of some sick kids in a family branch.

Dinner was amazing, a huge variety of different dishes for which I don’t know what the names, except for curry chicken, because I know those two words. There was homemade sausage, vegetables, various bowls of Asian-y stew-type things, oh, fried prawns, I recognized those too. There are great cooks in M.’s family.

His uncle joked with me that it was Thanksgiving.

After dinner, as I cradled an icy cold can of Tiger beer, in the combined living room/dining room where all of the furniture had been pushed back and card tables set up to accommodate all of the clan and the huge amount of food, out came the karaoke.

I cannot adequately set the scene. First, imagine any large gathering of family. Now, because a huge percentage of the tiny number of readers of this sad little blog are of the caucasian pallet, imagine that same family gathering with Chinese faces with all the same differences in age from babies to 90+ year olds. And, then there was me, as M.’s aunt called me, Gwailo, essentially “whitey.”

And then, karaoke. I did not sing, despite the admonitions and calls for “American Idol,” which would be me, the American. Singing, I cannot do.

(As a total aside, M.’s family has a spectrum of skin tones from the warmer side of the pallet. Lovely tones suited to the neighborhood and the climate, light browns and tans and such.

I am fair-skinned. When it is hot as a mother-fucker, which it certainly was last night, steamy, fucking hot, and I’ve spent the day in the sun, and I’m eating curries, and I’m drinking beer, I become the classic red-faced and splotchy tones of my potato-eating people. I am Ted Kennedy on a bender with tones of pink, white and red. It is my natural state.

It was hard to convince the folks that I wasn’t about to succumb to tropical heat and perish. Alas. Poor gwailo.)

Perhaps the highlight of the evening just for pure surreal — Was I really thousands of miles from home? — had to be M.’s cousin’s rendition of that Billy Ray Cyrus classic, Achey Breaky Heart. In the background, two of the aunts provided backup with an impromptu Electric Slide. I fear I will not leave this island until Aunt #6 successfully teaches me to line dance.