I can’t realize decide what is more pathetic — A woman who pretends she has a boyfriend or one who savors pretending she doesn’t.

M.’s job has a big old annual rah rah event right about the same time every year. This week. A bit less than a month ago the powers that be let him know he should expect to be at a banquet in a suburban Hyatt ballroom. The implication, tell your chick she’s living it solo on VD Day.

Honestly, I’m not a big fan of the day. It is a stupid holiday, live in lover or no. Being home alone with the remote control all mie, the freedom to dine on the couch and my groovilicious computer on my lap is actually suits me just fine.

I dropped by the grocery store on the way home. Instead of buying a quart of soup, I bought a lonely pint and some port wine cheese spread, knowing it as a swell accompaniment to delicious low-fat Triskets waiting in the cupboard. Living it up with the kind of festive fest with which I like to party alone.

Standing in line among a lot of dudes with last minute bouquets, chocolates, balloons and all, I cherished to soup for one shopping in my arms.

Of course, I’m a complete and total douche, playing a role while not one but two dozen long stems delivered to the office were chilling in my car.

Not sure why, but it reminded me of a Valentine’s Day a million and a half years ago. It was one of those bone chilling days with a soaking, icy rain falling. The kind of February weather that has you thinking in New England, if the Spring ever does come, you will have already succumbed to cabin fever and the first robin will probably arrive to peck the maggots off your decaying corpse.

Anywho. It was a sucky day on a sucky fake holiday and the doorbell rang. A delivery dude with a huge gardenia bush-like potted plant stood on my porch. I argued with him through a cracked door insisting that no fucking way was it possible that a VD delivery would be for me. We bickered in my nasty, cold, unloved state.

My uncle had sent them. Sweetheart he is.

Happy whatever holiday out there would float your boat and make you feel better than Hallmark ever will. With friends, family or loved ones, everyone has someone some time.