Here’s the short form, because I wasted time being a total douche over here.

Comedy can be fun. Two types of shows I like involve the flow when it just seems to work. In the first and rarest, everyone on the show is part of the same flow and the whole thing just rises with laughs and energy and whatnot. Everyone, audience and performers alike walk out smiling.

In the second, there are crickets and silences until someone on stage bitches about the audience being stiff or not digging it or something. The flow is dammed and in that moment of criticizing an audience (whose fault it rarely is) is where my competitiveness kicks in. I want to be the one who breaks the dam. And, then, in that moment when you get on stage and start, you can feel it when you get it and flow seeps back into the room. Sweet, just knowing that people who weren’t laughing and were etched with the stress of not laughing at comedy (because it is fucking stressful, people want the comedians to succeed) are laughing now.

I turned the mother out tonight. (Or at least I feel that way. Maybe on review of the video, it will be a delusional dream. For right now, the dream is alive. Fucking alive.)