Worked late today. Kept my head down pretty much most of the day. I have to at least periodically produce some work on paper to feel a little less pointless. All of the meetings, all of the time at work just meeting after friggin’ meeting, it wears you down. So many stupid people, so many ways to get nothing done; It hurts. If you’re sitting in a meeting and you can’t decide whether to stab yourself in order to get out of the room or stab whoever is inanely nattering just to make the noise stop, it’s a bad meeting. Thoughts of stabbing never bode well, I find.

But, today, I sustained myself by actually doing something. A document that needed to be completed, words to be written, a tangible result of labor. Sometimes something as simple as that helps the stabbing thoughts fade.

More importantly, I entertained the current fantasy — renting a beach house in Santa Cruz. Hanging on the board walk, cruising my convertible around the bay. That would be pretty cool. I could get the kind of admin job that starts and stops in non-intense intervals in a day or week, you know, like 9 to 5. Something in which I say, “Sure, I’ll collate that,” and I go home. Then, I have a little more time for me and a lot more energy. Writing, performing, animating, whatever. No stabbing thoughts.

Could I make any more fucking lists in this post?

So, here’s what I came home and did. It’s one drawing that will be part of an animation idea I have.