Today was one of those days at work that would be better if you were unemployed. It was a day where I think my bumper sticker should read “A bad day getting punched in the face repeatedly is better than a good day working.”

Unfortunately, I’m theoretically promoted. I say unfortunately, because so far it has meant that my responsibilities are less clear, what little sense of power and ownership I had has been diminished, and I’m fucking frustrated as all get out. The intrinsic issue with my job, which is unsolvable despite being able to pinpoit it, is the person above me. He means well, I think he truly doesn’t want to hurt me, but he is often myopic. His view is his view, and any stretching to understand our very different points of view has to be initiated by me. In the first couple of years I worked with him, he made it pretty clear that he was a lifer, not looking to make waves, just relaxing to retirement. But, in the past year or so, he’s had a lot of personal issues that have changed his point of view. In addition, he has developed a relationship with someone who is a political activist, so he has become more forceful, more assertive, less apt to live with the status quo.

His changes have made him my own personal glass ceiling. He wants to stay, and he wants to develop his position in a way he had not previously.

All of the dynamics forceably remind me, when he and I have to go against each other, that I have choices. I am not captive. I can leave.

And, now, M. is far away. It seems we both miss each other, and whether we are together or apart, we talk in a warm, comforting way.

Do I turn my back on a job that has in many ways developed more than I expected? Do I walk away from the person with whom I mostly work, who encourages me that the glass ceiling is crackable, that if I trust her, she will ensure that my skills are used, my job satisfactory?

Do I move West, and try something new, simultaneously safe with M. and also taking a chance on the unknown?

Help me out, see my poll on the right.