These are things I know:

I’m 40.
I’m unemployed, and I got a check for it today.
I’ve been drinking malt liquor.
Malt liquor is better than I remember as a kid, when it came in some quasi-beer form.
“Mike’s Hard Tea” tastes nothing like tea.
Arguing and talking with comics is stupid but fun.
Some of the folks I like, maybe love, am amused by and trust are comics.
I have seen various degrees of undress from most of the people with whom I was arguing and talking tonight.
Still and all, my boy-o, is buff, American and beats them hands down.
I made a couple bucks off of homeade T-shirts.
I made a couple more bucks selling kitsch to a kitschy store.
I talked with an antique dealer about some stuff that will have to go.
One of my best friends suggested I wear pants more often.
I’m 40, I’m unemployed, I’m drinking malt liquor, but I ain’t complaining.