For awhile now, I’ve taken to chucking my clothes into locker 41 in the workplace gymnasium. Why? To remind myself I’m 41 and at the goddamn gym.

Tucked in the back of that locker one day I found pellets. Not some kind of polite term for scat, but ammunition for an air gun or bb gun or something on the harmless end of the relatively lethal weapon scale. Of course, the Boston Police were able kill a Red Sox fan with pepper spray, so mileage could vary.

I found evidence of gun play in a work locker. Can you imagine what would have happened at my last job?

If they were able to fantasy violence where there was none and go to extremes based on fantasy, I think it safe to bet that the discovery of a box of BBs would require full on SWAT teams, metal detectors, gunpowder sniffing dogs and POW camps.