Tag Archives: California

Onward and upward or hope springs eternal

Well, one offer down and maybe onto another. I guess the cliche for those with faith is something about shutting doors but opening a window, but you’d need some kind of divine actor to keep the right sentence structure.

in simpler, perhaps less hackneyed, words, the owner of the house on which we made an offer did us a huge fucking favor by being a dick. We heard the classic chestnut (sorry more cliches) that our offer was “insulting.” Yeah, fucking right, if “insult” equates with market pricing.

We pitched low, because the square footage was less than we wanted and the flood insurance would have blown (mentally and budget wise). The cherry on that cake was that there would be no refrigerator or washer or dryer in the deal. Didn’t expect the second really, but some has them, and almost everywhere we’ve looked we’ve seen a ‘frig or a discount. The icing would be the gopher holes on visit two.

(Of course, like any Caddy Shack fan, I can see the benefit of the critters for old time fine. They sure can dance.)

The cool part is about two streets away from that overpriced but in sweet shape abode was a similar model. Just a bit more down the road from the mighty purty and cool beach, plus the conveniently located, walking distance grocery store.

Only this puppy has got your extra family room for our family puppet shows or what not. Really, define family before you go condemning us on our need for American, excessive elbow room. Family room it shall be, because “couple room” sounds stupid and kind of sad in a porno way, and “den” is too fucking “Ward, don’t you think you were a little hard on the Beaver.”

(Always go for the extra square footage afterall. Else you are living in one of good, old Pat’s memorable quotes about coupledom and home ownership — “Rats’ll kill each other in a small enough cage.” I think that’s the line.)

Better than the extra square footage , sweeter than sweet extra feet, there’s the lower fucking price. Not so much lower that I’m doing a jig, but at least $200 lower by square foot. Not to mention all new appliances. On top, the flippers doing up the construction are sympatico on the aesthetics front–hardwood floors, ceramic tiles, crown molding and a slate fireplace.

Bringing it on home — Not one, not two but three, count ’em folks, I saw them with my own eyeses fruit bearing trees. Who knew fruit grew on trees? I’m not sure why two lemon, but combine them with the apple and what you got is kickass pie. (If it turns out the not yet installed stove is gas, I just might cream something.)

Goddamnit, I wish I knew

We visited the place we are thinking about offering cash money to buy. A 1950s GI Bill tract house very near the Pacific Ocean and chock l modern, upgraded goodness. (As a couple, M. and I aren’t really looking for the handyman special.)

It may even have my California fantasy fruit tree in the back. But, I don’t know. What the fuck is this? Botanists? Horticulturists? Anyone, Bueller?

Help me.

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The peculiar alienation of unfamiliar lodging

I’m awake in a hotel room. I never know what to do with myself in hotel rooms. Especially if it’s for work, for which, on this case, this isolated room in wine country is occupied right now. By me.

I drank some Napa wine. I did some Wii exercising. I did some whirlpooling in the bathtub. Then, I stayed up too late. Only it’s no later than I usually do. It’s just I can’t guage time in the hotel vortex.

I know how to handle free time alone at home. I cherish free time alone at home.

But, in hotel land, I don’t know what to do with myself. I thinks it’s because I have to use a different remote.

Blood on the tracks

I finally have the iPhone weblogging through WordPress thing working. That should have a link, but I don’t see that happening in my phone tests.

Last night, a big old Tuesday night, M. and I rarer than rare each had something to do. Something that didn’t involve the other one. Separate but equal.

While I had wine and cheese and salsa and chips and whatnot at a friend’s brand new shiney condo in which she was soliciting decorating ideas and sorting photos, M. was mad strategizing in corporate land. Planning and plotting through his increasingly elevated status in the workforce.

Consequently, we didn’t talk much after I got home, since it was getting late into snoozing time. He did tell me about a highway calamity he had steered himself through, but in his half asleep state it wasn’t a dramatic tale.

Now, in a cheesy 1970s mystery TV show moment, a Time-Life book series on extrasensory perception, I had a thought while driving last night. In the late dark, with only a tiny double dot of light in the distance ahead of me and blackness in my rearview mirror, I considered the empty fields and canyons and hills and wild spaces adjacent to the road on which I was driving too fast. I imagined any number or type of wild thing leaping out fromu the shadows.

This highway, 280, is smooth and fast and beautiful. It ranks highly as scenic. Driving it just feels like California looks like it should feel. Imagining a silhouette blocked in your headlights, stag horns and hooves isn’t a leap from reality.

Today I got the story from M. He drove the same 280, although I had been south heading north and he north to south.

During his drive, he watched a small deer clash and lose against an SUV. It was sent skyward and landed in the path if his car. With cars on either side and no where to swerve, he had to drive through.

M. said he could feel it under his tires and hear the crack of bone. His front bumper is stained with streaks of sticky-looking red with bits of dirt, hair and grass.

Still and all, I’m happy, we’re happy he, M. made it safely with his car still fine.

Man that he is, the man who chooses to live with me, he’s curious about eradicating the traces of blood and DNA, an important lesson. For my part, I want to know if the dudes at the carwash are required to ask you the nature of the blood and hair before they detail your vehicle.

I just hope we haven’t just entered the final chapter that guarantees my place as a victimized woman feature in a made for TV movie. Isn’t this how it all unravels?

Random in Cali

I’m actually writing this completely horizontally on my iPhone. I should be sleeping.

By the way, like the big douche with disposable income I am, I did upgrade to the faster phone. It’s M.’s fault or maybe his company’s. They gave him the latest in corporate tethering, aka a Blackberry.

So, at the mall to buy a bag worthy to hold two cell phones, there was nary a line and about 15 minutes later we had new toys.

Anyway this picture if it comes out was on my walk to work. I couldn’t resist free apricots.

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