While searching the Internet for whether there is a battery charger out there for my Powerbook, whose power source has shit the bed, I discovered a kind of porn I vaguely knew existed but not really. That porn? ‘Toon porn, as in cartoons and comics and various sick fucked up drawings.

For a period of time of which I am not proud, I looked at various pics of America’s favorite cartoon family that I am sure Matt Groenig would never have inked. (Don’t worry that link is to the actual, official Simpsons site not the pornalized versions.)

Besides learning that many cartoon pornography artists are not evidently native English speakers or quite the cartoonists that Groenig is, I also learned that apparently a section of the human race imagines them in incestuous activities. I’m sorry, but I don’t really believe that Lisa would allow Bart to cum all over her. In some weird evidence of porn restraint, I didn’t see anything involving baby Maggie. That omission provides me some comfort.

I almost added one of the pics here that was basically a comic book multi-panel layout with dialogue. What made it interesting to me, since Homer doing Lisa ain’t really my thang, was the completely butchered English. It was kind of, sort of Simpsonesque, if translated by the same people who make fortune cookies, and cartoony, sophomorically dirty.

Meanwhile, the other thing I learned is that there are an incalculable number (OK, maybe that’s hyberbolic), anyway a great honking load of sites, with drawings of rape fantasies. I guess carefully drawn, detailed art work depicting blood dripping from tied up women’s orifices is a marked improvement over the real deal. Still and all, more than a bit creepy to me, even if I struggle to maintain an open mind.